Birthday On A Valentine’s Day

The record of my birth, both on the hospital-issued birth certificate and the church-issued baptismal card, indicates that I was born at 7:15pm on a certain Sunday when the calendar read February 14.

I have never been particularly enthusiastic about marking this day. The little excitement that comes with it these days was born of social pressure – people have kept reminding me that I was born on February 14 and that it should be celebrated. More so, the day coincides with what has been termed Valentine’s Day, adding more prominence and gloss to the day.

The first time I really succumbed to this pressure was after my graduation from the university years ago. It happened that February 14 of that year had coincided with exactly one week after my project defence. On that Tuesday, I had taken my three closest classmates, John-Bell, Bede, and Has, to a new fast food outlet at Unizik junction where we treated ourselves to plates of white ice cream. I then took two plates home to give to two affable girls in my hostel who had warned me in the morning never to return empty-handed on my birthday. I must confess that before this time, I rarely noticed my birthday, and often remembering that I had added one year only a few days after it had passed.

My moderate excitement about birthday has allowed me some level of detachment that has enabled me to reflect more philosophically on it. I have come to observe that my birthday represents an unswervable countdown to the end of my life. While each birthday is a year added to my age, it is also a year deducted from my life. On every February 14, I’m a year closer to my grave!

This grim reality spells some far-reaching implications for our existence as humans. It is a compelling cause for a sober reflection on the meaning of our existence in this universe of God and how we’re to live in it. It makes a strong case for a reappraisal of our individual worldview and dispositions, especially as they relate to material acquisitions, greed, and attachment to our ego.

However, there is something indeed enlivening about the way birthday is represented and treated in the social sphere. The celebratory and joyous manner society approaches this phenomenon is a strong indication that we can make happiness of life irrespective of its challenges and bleak realities. In spite of the grim realisations and sad emotions which birthday should ordinarily evoke, human society and culture have successfully transformed it into a thing of joy and merrymaking. People celebrate the yearly reduction in the length of their life as though they don’t dread dying. That’s human philosophical and emotional creativity at its glowing best.

So, the lesson is this: you can enjoy life and be happy despite all its tragic side as represented by our existential limitations, various socio-economic lacks, environmental challenges like harsh weather and natural disasters, man-made accidents, illnesses, and death. Yes, we can, through creative thinking, focus on the positives of life. More so, even those aspects that seem negative may become better appreciated by us through philosophical thinking. Also, through selfless living devoid of grudges and rich in forgiveness, we would be dispelling negative energies from our life, making us happier.

Our struggles and sadness have a lot to do with our understandings and dispositions towards life. Luckily, the scope of our existential creativity is limitless; we can create company in a lonely world, joy in a joyless world, happiness in a sad world, and peace in a restless world. Let’s do it!

This is my meditation this midweek.

Happy birthday to me.

Henry Chigozie Duru, PhD, teaches journalism and mass communication at Nnamdi Azikiwe University, Awka, Nigeria.